Sometimes It's Best to Chose You

I am a bit of a sensitive soul. I would like to think that I get it from my Papa. In all honesty, I would be happy to say that I anything from him; he was just that sort of man.

The good and the bad of this is that you feel a little more. You don't want to hurt other people, even when you are hurting a bit yourself.

I remember when I was 10 and my Papa took me into his doctor's office to remove these thingys from my feet. He made sure to numb them so much that I wouldn't feel a thing for weeks. Everytime there would be the tiniest bit of blood, he would get nervous and warn me not to look, not to look. Which of course meant that I looked. Which of course made him more nervous. Even though he realistically knew that I couldn't feel anything, the thought of causing me any discomfort hurt him. I am pretty sure the entire procedure was harder on him than it was on me.

Friday night I cancelled dinner plans with two friends in favor of staying home and sleeping. I was worn out, tired and it came down to keeping these plans and possibly losing it mentally or keeping my sanity and possibly losing two friends.

And while I do feel bad about bailing, I feel all that much better having taken a night to myself. And I know I owe them both a phone call, an explanation, some sort of follow up apology to my email. But sometimes it is just be easier to let things go, rather than take things on.